News Just In

by Glenn Fairman   2/15/14

It was revealed that earlier this morning a hybrid form of weasel/sloth revered by the D.C. natives as “Justacommie Barry” crawled out of his hole at 1600 Pennsylvania Avenue and indeed not only perceived his own shadow but the shadow of destruction that his last term of office has leveled on America.

So pleased was he that Barry predicted four more years of: economic upheaval, moral disintegration, constitutional dismantling, and narcissistic bloviating about his unprecedented supremacy within the Presidential Pantheon.

It was later reported that he later scurried back into his loathsome burrow after wiping himself on an American flag.
Glenn Fairman writes from Highland, Ca. He can be reached at

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2 Responses to News Just In

  1. Timothy Lane says:

    Now, I want to get this straight: This is a parody, right? The actions (most notably Justacommie Barry wiping himself on an American flag) didn’t really happen, did they? Besides, he’ll only be Despot-in-Chief for 3 more years, unless he finds a way to set himself up as Dictator-for-Life.

  2. glenn fairman says:

    Scout’s honor

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