I am Barack Obama

SellwynThumbby Selwyn Duke5/10/16
It’s always hard coming out. But it’s even harder not being true to yourself. So, inspired by Bruce Jenner and other intrepid souls, I’ve decided to finally start living the life I was meant to: I identify as Barack Obama.

Oh, I can hear the cynical statements now. “Duke, your I.Q. is 50 points too high.” “Duke, you can speak fluently without a Teleprompter.” “Duke, you know there aren’t 60 states and can pronounce “corpsman.” “Duke, you’re melanin compromised.” All these things are inconsequential details, the stuff of tiresome prigs — sort of like genitalia on a man.

Given my identity, compassion dictates I be allowed to use the bathroom of my choice. My preferred bathroom happens to be in the White House. The same is true of my preferred bedroom, kitchen, living room, Blue Room, Green Room and Map Room; and my preferred chef, servants and security detail. I’ll have my preferred executive orders, too.

Some backward thinkers will insist I use the facilities appropriate to my station; others, thinking themselves reasonable, will offer to paint my place white and erect four majestic columns at its entrance. To them I will say, you’re insensitive, bigoted, narrow-minded, unscientific, ambition-phobic racists who should be killed with fire. As with the children and youths for whom the Obama administration (my administration) has so courageously taken up the cudgels, it is unconscionable to suggest I shouldn’t be allowed to use the facilities consistent with my identity.

Many, though, in the grip of white “male” (whatever that is) linear thinking, will dismiss my righteous claim by flippantly saying I’m not Barack Obama. Well, this is my reality — not yours. As American Thinker’s James Arlandson recently pointed out, philosopher Immanuel Kant informed that “we can’t know the ‘thing-in-itself’ without our mind filtering it.” Fellow enlightener Friedrich Nietzsche further clarified that “[e]verything is Interpretation: … Against those who say ‘There are only facts,’ I say, ‘No, facts are precisely what there is not, only interpretations.’ We cannot establish any fact in itself.”

And my own personal, provisional fact is that I have strong and persistent feelings I’m really Barack Obama. If you say feelings aren’t facts, you’re not paying attention.

Everything is relative to a reality that isn’t really there.

Besides, don’t be an unscientific fascist. When a born-male sentient biped informs us he’s really a girl — which is now old hat and needn’t even be questioned — rightful deference is shown to his reality because, as PsychCentral.com puts it, he has exhibited “gender dysphoria,” which is defined by “strong and persistent cross-gender identification.” Oh, I know you’ve heard that intrauterine anomalies might cause the brain of a developing XY-biped to not be fully masculinized. Ze may then end up with a “female brain.” Of course, a recent scientific study purports to have debunked the very notion of male and female brains, but it doesn’t matter.

There is no brain scan used to confirm the “realness” of a gender dysphoria diagnosis.

There’s no genetic test used.

There’s no hormonal test.

There’s no medical test of any kind.

Rather, the diagnosis is based, again, on strong and persistent cross-gender identification — on strong and persistent feelings — lasting for more than six months, that you’re really, deep down, a member of the social construction fascists call “the opposite sex.”

So don’t waste time telling me a brain scan would reveal that I don’t have the gray matter of a Barack Obama, that my brain is in a considerably more used condition. Don’t tell me that “status dysphoria” is a mental disorder. I have feelings, too. And my feelings say I’m what fascists call “the guy I voted for.”

The point is that, scientifically, there’s every bit as much medical proof a trans-status biped such as me is Barack Obama as there is that a “transgender” person is an opposite-sex member. Ze’s stuck in the wrong body — I’m stuck in the wrong position.

Our trans-status and transgender diagnostic methods would constitute malpractice in any other branch of medicine, you say? You may claim that recommending someone for “sexual-reassignment surgery” based on a gender dysphoria diagnosis is akin to a patient exclaiming to a cardiologist, “Doc, I have strong and persistent feelings I have heart disease! I need a bypass!” and the physician responding, “Have they lasted for more than six months? Yeah? Okay, well, medical tests show no signs of arteriosclerosis. But, what the heck, I’ll cut your chest open.” My response to this line of what fascists call reasoning is, you’re an insensitive, bigoted, narrow-minded, unscientific, ambition-phobic racist who should be killed with fire.

And be warned, we trans-statuses and transgenders will have many allies in our bonfire of the insanities. Psychologists also define something called “species dysphoria,” which is when an individual identifies as a different kind of creature. Examples of people brave enough to live as their true animal selves may be Texas resident Wolfie Blackheart, who insists “I am a canine”; and a Norwegian woman called “Nano” who says she’s a cat. (Question: if Wolfie and Nano met, would they fight like…well, you know? And would they identify it as a catfight?)

Note also, there’s every bit as much scientific evidence of trans-status’ and transgender’s validity as there is of trans-species’ validity.

In our camp also should be those with Body Integrity Identity Disorder (BIID). These people insist that one or more body parts, such as their legs or eyes, don’t belong on/in their bodies. Not only have some mutilated or blinded themselves on this basis, but there are enlightened physicians who, respecting these patients’ identity, have agreed to perform amputations. And why not? Remove what’s between your legs — remove your legs — whatever makes you happy.

And remember, there’s every bit as much scientific evidence of trans-status’, transgender’s and trans-species’ validity as there is evidence that a BIID biped really should be a no-ped. Feelings über alles.

So I am Barack Obama. At least, that is, until January 20, 2017, at which time I may identify as Donald Trump or Hillary Clinton. And they’re coming to take me away, ho-ho, hee-hee, ha-ha. Or are they coming to take you away, bigoted, narrow-minded, unscientific, ambition-phobic racists who should be killed with fire? That all depends on the outcome of these refreshingly fact-free culture wars.

May the strongest feelings win.


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15 Responses to I am Barack Obama

  1. Kung Fu Zu Kung Fu Zu says:

    Excellent article!

    Do not doubt that those pushing this “trans” nonsense gain monetarily from it.

    The shrinks have more patients. The lawyers have more clients.

    And, of course, the government has more control.

    I have long thought that a large percentage of those in the mental health profession enter it as they have psychological problems and want to understand what is wrong with them. Of course there are those who simply want to manipulate people.

  2. Timothy Lane says:

    Something like this happened when a Swedish woman “identified” as a 6.5 foot Japanese man — and students at the school she was visiting couldn’t bring themselves to deny her “feelings”. Sanity is now politically incorrect. (Hey, do you think you could do a little reprogramming with certain codes, and get rid of a few undesirable cities, like Boston and Chicago?)

    Kung Fu Zu might recall the Macy’s psychiatrist in Miracle on 34th Street.

  3. Rosalys says:

    And there is a 52 year old man in Canada, who has “gone back” (How can one go back to something that never existed?) to being a six year old girl – and been adopted by two morons.

    http://www.dailymail.co.uk/femail/article-3356084/I-ve-gone-child-Husband-father-seven-52-leaves-wife-kids-live-transgender-SIX-YEAR-OLD-girl-named-Stefonknee.html

    It gets even worse as can be seen in the first picture in the article. There is something seriously wrong with a six year old who still uses a Binky! Gotta get that kid to psych right away!

    • Kung Fu Zu Kung Fu Zu says:

      She also spends much of her time raising awareness for the transgender community and attending rallies.

      Don’t you know, that six year olds are very concerned about raising awareness for transgenders?

      This is some of the most unmitigated hogwash I have ever seen. These people are lying scum and should be given about 500 volts of electro-shock treatment for about five minutes. Am I being too harsh? These scoundrels and those who push them want nothing more than to destroy our culture.

      The Left wants to spread confusion. A confused populace is an easily influenced populace. The fact that so many people appear to be confused about human biology shows how successful the Left has been.

      • Rosalys says:

        “Am I being too harsh?”

        No! Indeed, I think you are being too kind!

        • Timothy Lane says:

          It’s impossible to be too harsh about liberal corruption of thought, and not just regarding “transgenders”. Just now, on O’Reilly, a Democrat female spokesliar was repeating the usual canard about women making so much less than men (which is based on all women vs. all men, regardless of position, hours, or experience). She even justified it by saying that in public positions she made less than men, and she’s sure that was unfair (O’Reilly was properly skeptical). It reminds me of the whiny Muppet with an obnoxious voice who was sure she didn’t get a job because she was a woman — and it turns out the job was doing sermonettes over the phone.

          • Brad Nelson Brad Nelson says:

            These evil people (I do not believe for a moment they are well-meaning) would crush humanity under their heal to achieve their barren and beastial version of “equality.” And that is not an exaggeration. No hyperbole at all. Last century has recorded 100 million deaths in the chase for equality.

            What we are talking about is people who feel inferior and therefore must bring others down to their level because they think the other got a good break and they got a bad break. Leftist “equality” is completely and irrevocably based on a poisonous grievance.

            All of this philosophy is over the top of Trump’s head. Good luck with either of these lowest-common-denominator people as our next president.

            • Timothy Lane says:

              It’s no accident that I use demonic epithets for Big Brother Barry. I regard liberalism as demonic, and noted in 2012 that the biggest delusion in America was the belief that Obama means well.

      • Brad Nelson Brad Nelson says:

        So why is Trump our champion if he couldn’t even manage 1/4 the megawattage that Mr. Kung did on the subject?

    • Timothy Lane says:

      Now we know what they meant when they talked about a “second childhood”. I didn’t know it also meant a sex change.

  4. Anniel says:

    I always check AT to see if there just might be a couple of good articles. Early this morning as I read this article and the comments on it I laughed so loud I woke Bear and he told me to calm down so he could sleep. Then he laughed with me. Thank you for making our day start in such an enjoyable fashion, Mr. Duke. . . Errrr, whomever.

    I, personally, think you have more than a 50 point IQ advantage over your alter ego.

  5. Anniel says:

    The Trechsel part of the clan lives in Geneva. Bear’s great grandfather was the designer and chief engineer on the building of the Simplon Tunnel. Bear has always wanted to go to Switzerland just to go through the tunnel.

    Bear’s Grandfather Otto had a twin sister named Marguerite, who married a Trechsel. Otto returned to Switzerland many times to be with her. Her children and grand children visited in the U.S. over the years. Our eldest son visited Switzerland and became friends with the Trechsels.

    • Kung Fu Zu Kung Fu Zu says:

      I lived in the German-speaking part of Switzerland between Zurich and Lucerne.

      Yes. the Swiss are big tunnelers. I don’t recall if I have ever gone through the Simplon Tunnel, but it sounds impressive. The Gotthard Tunnel is also something.

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