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Author Topic: Music for the Pols
Timothy-
Lane
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Post Music for the Pols
on: April 8, 2019, 15:22
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Donald Trump plays the Rolling Stones' "You Can't Always Get What You Want" at his rallies (an appropriate song for conservatives). But as every Demagogue prepares to run for President this year, what songs would be appropriate for them? I have a few ideas.

Michael Bloomberg talks about running, possibly as an independent, but he usually ends up doing nothing. (A pity. I'd rather he spent all that money on a futile campaign than on issue campaigns against gun rights.) The song for him would be "Abe Snake for President" by Stan Freberg.

Howard Schultz is even likelier to run, also as an independent. His song should be "Black Coffee" by Petula Clark. (You knew she was going to show up here, didn't you?)

Kirsten Gillibrand is also running, for reasons no one can figure out. Her obvious choice would be "Goodbye to Love" by the Carpenters.

Bill de Blasio has also talked about running, something no one else even in his own city wants --- but narcissists never let themselves see such unpleasant details. The obvious song for him is "The Boy from New York City".

Blonde Squaw With Empty Head obviously should use "Indian Reservation" by Paul Revere and the Raiders as her campaign song. She probably even wears a shirt and tie.

Eric Swalwell has also announced. His obvious choice would be another Rolling Stones song, "Sympathy for the Devil". (Actually, that would be appropriate for several of them.)

Pete Battygeek of South Bend is also running, as a homosexual activist. A good choice for him would be "Are You a Boy, or Are You a Girl?" by the Barbarians. This will be even more apt when an actual sexual dysphoric (aka, a transgender) runs, but so far I don't think that's happened. If that does happen, the logic alternative would be "I'm Your Venus".

Beta Male the Dork actually has measurable popularity as a political rock star. Perhaps the most appropriate song for him would be "Supercalifragilisticexpialidocius" from Mary Poppins.

Mazie Hirono's campaign song should be something Polynesian, but the closest I can come up with from popular music would be "Bloody Mary" from South Pacific. It describes her charisma perfectly.

John Delany is also running, and his obvious title would be "Who Am I" by Petula Clark.

Bernie Sanders obviously should run to George Orwell's "Beasts of England", the Animal Farm equivalent of "The Internationale".

I'll leave things here at the moment.

Kung Fu Zu
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Kung Fu Zu
Post Re: Music for the Pols
on: April 8, 2019, 16:01
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I like your list. The first song which came to mind with Mazie Hirono (and several others you mentioned) was Sayonara.

But I think if you want to match the song to the character, this strange Indian version is more appropriate.

Truly strange.

Timothy-
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Post Re: Music for the Pols
on: April 10, 2019, 13:28
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Some more possible songs here. Cory Bugger might go with King Crimson's "21st Century Schizoid Man". Spacey Abrams obviously should use the Rolling Stones' "Paint it Black". Amy Klobuchar's hopeless quest could be done to "Elusive Butterfly".

And Slick Hilly continues to think about running. Perhaps her campaign song should be "I Started a Joke" by the Bee Gees.

Brad-
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Brad Nelson
Post Re: Music for the Pols
on: April 11, 2019, 10:18
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Blonde Squaw With Empty Head obviously should use "Indian Reservation" by Paul Revere and the Raiders as her campaign song. She probably even wears a shirt and tie.

My vote for Fauxahontas is Cher’s Half Breed.

For Howard Schultz, The Coffee Song comes to mind.

For Joe Biden it has to be Dan Hill’s Sometimes When We Touch.

For Beta Male the Dork, I’d go wth Disco Duck.

For Bill de Blasio it can only be Napoleon XIV’s They're Coming to Take Me Away.

Bernie Sanders requires more thought. But I’ll go with Lennon’s Revolution.

Timothy-
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Post Re: Music for the Pols
on: April 11, 2019, 10:36
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"Half Breed" has a point: "Both sides were against me from the day I was born." That certainly gives a good hint at the lack of popularity of a candidate barely running third in her home state. And I see you managed to get a Sinatra song in there, and a very appropriate one. Incidentally, there really is coffee ice cream. When we went to Coney Island, I had a great success with a cone of coffee and pistachio ice cream. (The success was making my brother and sister gag.)

Of course, "Revolution" is theoretically opposed to the revolution, though Lennon himself preferred some ambiguity on the subject. The Napoleon XIV song is a favorite. He did a lot of songs, nearly all dealing with the same subject (insanity) in one form or another. (I have a collection of them, which I play on occasion.)

Brad-
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Brad Nelson
Post Re: Music for the Pols
on: April 11, 2019, 10:50
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And, as for Michael Bloomberg, I nominate the Ramone’s 53rd and 3rd about a teenage rent boy working a notorious New York City pickup corner to fuel his heroine habit. With some irony involved, one could substitute Billy Joel’s excellent New York State of Mind.

Timothy-
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Post Re: Music for the Pols
on: April 11, 2019, 11:59
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Thinking of Billy Joel, perhaps "Scenes From an Italian Restaurant" would do for Bill de Blasio, and "Allentown" might work for the Yellow Jester. "Only the Good Die Young" might do for one of the elder candidates (Bernie Bro is the oldest), and Beta Male the Dork might be a good fit for "Movin' Out".

Brad-
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Brad Nelson
Post Re: Music for the Pols
on: April 12, 2019, 08:44
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Timothy, I’m still traumatized by the fact the Fleetwood Mac let “Don’t Stop” be used and ruined by The Clinton Crime Family. Okay, I get that most musicians are libtards. But did they have to go that far?

So at the end of the day, I would ask Trump and everyone else to quit trying to brand themselves with popular music. If they must have some stage gimmicky, try some Bach or Mozart.

Kung Fu Zu
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Kung Fu Zu
Post Re: Music for the Pols
on: April 12, 2019, 09:50
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So at the end of the day, I would ask Trump and everyone else to quit trying to brand themselves with popular music. If they must have some stage gimmicky, try some Bach or Mozart.

A forlorn wish. While the opening bar of Beethoven's 5th or Grieg's Piano Concerto in A minor might stick in the public's mind, it is doubtful that the public could maintain much more than those first few notes and it would get very tedious to here them repeated over and over again.

Timothy-
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Post Re: Music for the Pols
on: April 12, 2019, 10:33
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Well, I can remember when Quaker Puffed Rice (I think) was advertised using music from the 1812 Overture that actually consisted of the (Tsarist) Russian national anthem. So it can be done, or at least was 50 years ago.

Meanwhile, "California Dreamin'" might be appropriate for Camelface Harris. As I recall, Fletcher Knebel had "California, Here I Come" as a theme song for the California candidate in Convention. It probably has been used that way for actual California candidates, too. (It may be -- or have been at the time -- the state song. Indeed, John Hickenlooper could do worse than "Rocky Mountain High", which has become even more apt these days.)

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