Betty Crocker Rag

RonNby Brad Nelson7/27/15
My brother was in the office the other day and he debuted the lyrics to a song that he thought I’d like. And I did. I didn’t hear the tune yet (until just now), but I thought it was one of the best things he’d written. He gave me permission to share it here. Maybe ya’ll could help it go viral.

Ron is not a touchy-feely “social justice” Christian but believes in standards…particularly that of religious freedom as enshrined in our Constitution, something that the Pink Mafia is dead-set against as they try to intimidate us and cram their twisted homosexual agenda down our throats.

Ron has done what so few others have…taken arms in the battle of the cultural wars. So without further adieu…

Betty Crocker Rag

In Oregon two bakers never had a clue,
What it would cost to make a stand for what they thought was true.
One man for one woman,
That was their point of view. So they said,
“We won’t bake a wedding cake for you.”

Well it wasn’t long before the “Left” made a big ta-doo,
Mocked the bakers for their faith,
And their religious views. When they,
Called the bakers homophobes,
The bakers said anew,
“We won’t bake a wedding cake for you.”

We won’t bake a wedding cake for you,
No, we won’t compromise,
What we believe is true.
Don’t try and tell us how to think,
What we can say or do.
Cuz we won’t bake a wedding cake for you.

Break

Well, the bakers lost their business, their reputation to,
Told to pay a hefty fine, no more interviews.
It seems they lost this battle,
But the war is far from through, still,
They won’t bake a wedding cake for you.

They won’t bake a wedding cake for you,
No they won’t compromise,
What they believe is true.
Don’t try and tell them how to think,
What they can say or do.
Cuz they won’t bake a wedding cake for you.

Break

Now, I have a great idea for that couple they refused,
Try a Muslim baker and see just what he’ll do,
Oh I bet he won’t be bakin,
Bet the “Left” they won’t say boo.
No he won’t bake a wedding cake for you.

He won’t bake a wedding cake for you,
No, he won’t compromise,
What he believes is true.
Don’t ever tell a muslim guy,
What he can say or do.
Cuz he won’t bake a wedding cake for you.

Break

Now the bakers they’re not homophobes, that’s not the real issue.
It’s not about hate or fear,
Or them not loving you.
Its about religious freedom,
And our First Amendment rules.
And my right to bake or not to bake
A wedding cake for you.

So, I won’t bake a wedding cake for you, if I have to
Compromise my faith,
What I believe is true.
If you try and tell me how to think,
What I can say or do.
Than I won’t bake a wedding cake, sorry I can’t participate, no I won’t bake a wedding cake for you.


Brad is editor and chief disorganizer of StubbornThings.
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Brad Nelson

About Brad Nelson

I like books, nature, politics, old movies, Ronald Reagan (you get sort of a three-fer with that one), and the founding ideals of this country. We are the Shining City on the Hill — or ought to be. However, our land has been poisoned by Utopian aspirations and feel-good bromides. Both have replaced wisdom and facts.
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20 Responses to Betty Crocker Rag

  1. Brad Nelson Brad Nelson says:

    Truth is, Brother Ron is pretty tolerant about this sort of stuff. He doesn’t go around with his fists balled up hating queers. The subject rarely comes up except perhaps in reference to Freddie Mercury (who was one hot-blooded homosexual).

    What the dishonest and dastardly Left has more or less successfully done is equate not swallowing down their pro-homo, anti-family agenda as some kind of hate crime. Now, you may know a homosexual person in your own life. And he or she may be a very nice person. But the homosexual agenda is not a nice agenda. And we see that unequivocally now.

    And those “nice” Ken-and-Chad homosexual couples we keep hearing about have no one but themselves to blame for not speaking out against the Pink Mafia, just as blacks are to blame for not speaking out against obvious racists such as Al Sharpton or Obama. They think that there is more to be gained because “their side” is being forwarded.

    But is “their side” pedophilia? Anti-Christianity? Anti-straight? Anti-family? Anti-religious-tolerance? Anti-free-speech? In practice, this is exactly what homosexuality now stands for, including bullying everyone else while insisting that unless we go along with their bullying that *we* therefore are the bullies.

    Congrats, Ron, on a fine song. I hope you inspire others to engage in the culture wars. Surrendering is for fools and cowards, and certainly not for authentic Christians.

  2. Timothy Lane says:

    A nice song there. I will note that the Kleins who ran Sweet Cakes by Melissa until the Lavender Thought Police destroyed it for the crime of heterodoxy probably didn’t hate homosexuals either (I understand the couple were in fact established customers of theirs, as was certainly the case with the Washington florist). They also set up a fund — initially on GoFundMe, then on another that was less amenable to homofascist pressure — that collected more than twice what they needed. And, as the song says, they still won’t bake a wedding cake for a homosexual “marriage”.

    Incidentally, “y’all” is basically a contraction for “you all”, so it should only be used for a plural you, and should be spelled as I did just now, not the popular “ya’ll” (which I see as a contraction of “ya will”).

    • Kung Fu Zu Kung Fu Zu says:

      Incidentally, “y’all” is basically a contraction for “you all”, so it should only be used for a plural you, and should be spelled as I did just now, not the popular “ya’ll” (which I see as a contraction of “ya will”).

      I see “you all” contracted to “y’all” as the equivalent of the German familiar you, “ihr” whereas the formal plural “you” is “sie”.

    • Brad Nelson Brad Nelson says:

      That’s all were getting out of Ron’s song is a correction on my contractions? 😀 I also read that “yawl” was acceptable.

      • Kung Fu Zu Kung Fu Zu says:

        I also read that “yawl” was acceptable.

        I think that is how we Texans spell it.

        • Brad Nelson Brad Nelson says:

          Yeah, but when you *say* it, doesn’t it have about 8 vowels?

          • Kung Fu Zu Kung Fu Zu says:

            Absoluuuuuuutuly.

            As I used to say, a Texan is the only person who can make “shit” a three syllable word. I am now too refined to say such a thing. But it is still true.

  3. Kung Fu Zu Kung Fu Zu says:

    I finally got around to listening to the song, and must say it put a smile on my face. I like the guitar especially.

    I have to think about how best to use this, but I do know some people I will send this to.

    Tell your brother to keep it up. I think this music will catch on in Texas and the South.

    One shot in an ongoing battle.

    • Brad Nelson Brad Nelson says:

      Hopefully Brother Ron will read this. If not, I’ll certainly bend his ear next time I see him.

      You Texans are all homophobes, so I figure it would do well there.

      • Kung Fu Zu Kung Fu Zu says:

        I have already sent it out to people in Idaho and South Carolina. I want to spread it far and wide. Texas is safe for now so we have to attack the fringes first. And then we will invade enemy territory, California and New York.

        I will also spread it to comrades in England, Australia and Austria. We must aim high to re-conquer the world. Your brother is going international!

        • Brad Nelson Brad Nelson says:

          He’ll be pleased to hear that. And we shouldn’t forget to forward it to places behind the iron curtain…such as Seattle. But that’s closer to home so I’ll try to do that.

  4. Tom Riehl Tom Riehl says:

    I think I’ll look up Brad Avakian’s email address and send it to him, the Commie POS! I live about twenty miles from the site of this infamy. I lived in Texas for three years about 43 years ago, and still miss the Cowboys and the beauty of the landscape.

  5. Pst4usa says:

    Brad, please tell Ron it is a great song for our times. Let the SCOTUS be dammed, They do not have the authority to redefine something that has been defined for more years than the country has existed; I am really tempted to go to SF and open a bakery in the most gay part of the city and post a sign that reads, If you are gay, I won’t bake a wedding cake for you!

    • Brad Nelson Brad Nelson says:

      Ron is so much more “tolerant” than I am. Me, if I write that song I’m rhyming things with bag-it, steer, and smudge-shacker. But that’s just me. Nothing against homosexuals, per se. But this issue is no longer about not getting people to beat up queers. It’s not even about normalizing a perversion. It’s about forcing it upon us, or else.

  6. Brad Nelson Brad Nelson says:

    Ron is writing another topical song. (Hint: abortion). I’ve heard the lyrics and they are very good. I suggested a song title for him because he didn’t have one yet. We’ll see if “The Organ Grinder Song” sticks. But I’ll share it here if and when he records it. I told him to do so ASAP given the timely subject (although it doesn’t appear to be going away quite immediately).

    • Kung Fu Zu Kung Fu Zu says:

      There is already a children’s song which might do. “Head and shoulders, knees and toes”. This could be changed to “Brain and liver, lungs and eyes.”

  7. Brad Nelson Brad Nelson says:

    My older brother, Ron, has a new song out: The Organ Grinder.

    He came to me with the lyrics a few weeks ago. He said he wanted it to have a circus sound to it. So I immediately had him listen to the intro of Three Dog’s Night The Show Must Go On. Yes. That’s what he wanted.

    But he didn’t have a title yet. He asked me for an idea. Immediately the obvious occurred: The Organ Grinder. So I have some very small hand in this, for good or for ill.

    • Timothy Lane says:

      Yes, I can see the similarity between the beginnings of his song and the Three Dog Night version of “The Show Must Go On”. (One difference between their version and Leo Sayre’s is that he doesn’t have that circus music.) Very appropriate for a song titled “The Organ Grinder”, making the actual contents perhaps even more shocking than they would otherwise be. Nice and vicious, and PP deserves every bit of it.

      • Brad Nelson Brad Nelson says:

        Yep. Nice and vicious. Give Brother Ron credit for not being a limp noodle. Too many of those going around these days. Everyone is willing to be “pro life.” But as Brother Ron reminded me, there is a big difference between the easy, self-serving rhetoric of “pro life” and that of “pro abolition.”

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